20 July 2007

Mustard Obsession

Is it possible to love mustard too much?

When I first went out into the world on my own, having little scratch and less sense, I lived for a good three or four months on baked potatoes and condiments. My favorite of these condiments was mustard. So, early on in our experience of new-found freedom, in a moment of what at the time we considered great opportunity, my roommate and I left a shopping trip to a discount wholesaler with a 10 gallon barrel of yellow mustard.

I don't actually know who this 10 gallon drum was intended for. Perhaps the hot dog guy at the Yard. Perhaps a house-painter. We, however, saw this as a great investment as not only did it nightly fill us with yummy nutritious mustard, but also served as an excellent conversation piece.

The years have passed and my tastes have refined, but I still make sure the fridge is always stocked with mustard.

Today I ask your patience as I blog exotic about the greatest commercially produced mustard known to humankind:

Inglehoffer & Beaverton Stone Ground Mustard.

This mustard is so full of stony richness and brown roastiness that here I dare to type through what in ordinary circumstances would be an embarrassing damming-up of saliva and enzymes. Inglehoffer & Beaverton is sold in 4oz jars. Why only 4oz? Because a mere mortal can't handle more than 4oz of Inglehoffer & Beaverton Stone Ground Mustard in a single sitting. In fact, actually using 4oz, even among friends at a picnic, would probably result in a minor cataclysm.

4oz. Jeez, but what if you could get more?

Hmm... perhaps we could just pretend we were a HOTEL and go this route. Oh, man. Oh, man. Stop me...

Ok. I think I'm in the clear. That is until I saw this! Inglehoffer & Beaverton HONEY mustard! Could it be true?!? The greatest honey mustard known to all of NAPA valley?

I need to get myself to a mustard-tasting.

In the meantime, I'll be picking up more of it here.


mike said...

Jack Daniels' Old No. 7 mustard is mighty tasty for a mustard available at most chain supermarkets.

Shep said...

If you like spicy at all and you like mustard and you like honey-mustard then let me propose this to you. Find your favorite wasabi mustard. You're going to do 2 parts mustard 1 part real honey maybe 3/5ths 2/5ths depending on what end of the spectrum you want to tweak the spicy/sweet aspects. Put your mustard in a food process and turn it on. Slowly (very slowly) pour the honey in and let it mix. It's the best damn honey mustard I've ever had.