20 August 2007

Do we really need Key Lime Pie flavored yogurt?

I'm a yogurt man.

I eat yogurt every morning for breakfast. Yogurt, a glass of 2% milk, a glass of OJ, and a small tray of vitamins.

I like my yogurt. I like my yogurt because I understand my yogurt. Hmm. What's in strawberry yogurt? Oh yeah, that's right: strawberries and yogurt.

It's real easy-like. Easy on the mind in that hazy region of existence known as morning.

SO.

What's with yogurt-makers coming up with these new-fangled flavors like Key Lime Pie and Mocha Latte?

I go to the store and buy strawberry yogurt and when I get home and peel back the foil-top, what's inside? Strawberries.

I go to the store and but Key Lime Pie yogurt and when I get home and peel back the foil-top, what's inside? Not a pie. No pie in sight. Don't even know how they'd expect anyone to believe they could have even fit a pie into one of those little containers.

Makes me mad.

Angry.

Confused.

And so I've decided to stay away from the nouveau-yogurts. From here on out, it's nothing but strawberry, peach, and raspberry. I don't like blueberry. The blueberries always get hard and it feels like you're eating scabs.

Though maybe that's better than the sheer disappointment manifested through the reality-punch you get straight to the gut when you open that foil and there's no pie in there.

The horror.

3 comments:

D said...

I thought you liked the lemon flavor yogurt?! Are there lemons in it??

Unknown said...

Of course there are. What do you think is in Lemon yogurt?

Freak.

Anonymous said...

You absolutely have to have key lime pie flavored yogurt. The world would not be the same without it. Yoplait has made it for years and it has been my favorite for years. It is almost like dessert. Use your imagination and pretend you are eating a key lime pie, it tastes just like it. However, my new favorite just might be the Stonyfield Farm Black Cherry Fruit on the Bottom. Tasty.